What I really think about my postnatal body

The truth about having babies is that they stretch you. Firstly your heart. No matter how many babies, whether they walk beside you on this earth or not. It just stretches and let’s in all this love. And tha’s what I must remember when I look in the mirror, but it isn’t. What I really think about my postnatal body is mostly hidden from the world. I’ll share pictures like this,

58 days postnatal. Two things. 1: I WISH this dress was breastfeeding friendly. 2: I LOVE spanx.

A photo posted by @ghostwritermummy on

but this is only acceptable to me with a layer of spanx, and when you strip away those comfort blankets the reality is so different. And I know I shouldn’t care, but I do. Having babies stretches you. Your body. And that hurts in more ways than one.

Post c-section, your body is not your own. And after 4 rounds of major abdominal surgery the chances of it returning to normal are pretty remote. I must find a new normal for this body now.

I have a band across the middle of my tummy that burns inside. I remember the dull pain from last time and I assume it is internal bruising but I’ve never asked so I cannot be sure. I have numbness around my scar and odd itching sensations that cannot ever be scratched.

And the rest of my postnatal body is just as battered. Worn down. Tired. That’s how I really feel.

I have four children. It faltered on the last, but my body created them. Nurtured them. Brought them to this world, one way or another. And yet what  it looks like matters! Despite the super hero type things it has done, how it looks still overshadows it’s achievements.

And while I know I am not supposed to care (I am supposed to embrace my bumps and wobbles and be glad that I can give squishy hugs) I really do. I care. I want to make changes to my body. Make it better. Healthier. To feed a happy mind, a happy heart. A content soul.

A start has been made. A pledge to myself, and writing it all here will now make it official, if only to me.

I want to change what I really think about my postnatal body. It is amazing. It can do so many things. It won’t let me down. It makes me happy.


In my bid to change the way I feel about my postnatal body I am on a mission to get more active. To swim more. Walk more. Run with the pram even. Watch this space…


    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:30 pm

      You’re right. And I am determined to get there! x x

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:30 pm

      Ha, the wonder of spanx!
      x x

  1. March 13, 2015 / 11:57 am

    Oh Sue, you *are* a superhero! I wish you the very best as you achieve your personal goals – and I’m certain that you will 🙂
    Karen Hannah recently posted..Review: Worm World by InterplayMy Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:29 pm

      Ah bless you! Thank you x x

  2. March 13, 2015 / 9:20 pm

    Oh I so know how you feel. I have only had 2 c sections and the overhang is just awful. I need to lose weight, sure. But there is a lot of stretch and marks that can never be changed. It’s very hard to come to terms with. Perhaps because my husband’s body hasn’t really changed. But I think we have to re-learn to love our bodies after pregnancy. They had to do a second incision for my second c section because my first one was so ragged after my first emergency which hasn’t helped at all. We as women need to support one another in doing this. X
    Laura’s Lovely Blog recently posted..Lovely Lists: Dresses to get you in the mood for SpringMy Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:28 pm

      Yes we do need to learn how to re-love our bodies, definitely. And yes it does feel a little unfair when our partners’bodies don’t change at all, I never thought of it like that x x

  3. March 13, 2015 / 10:11 pm

    Oh god, that band and the itching! If I remember correctly, I did ask about the hard band under my scar and was told that it was scar tissue and internal swelling. As for the itching, I still get that occasionally, even a year after having June so I totally sympathise there. I realise these things are totally subjective but I’ve only have half the babies you’ve had and I’d kill for a figure like yours!
    Jayne recently posted..Take Your Theory Test and Win an iPad!My Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:26 pm

      My surgeon told me that I have no scar tissue at all- I was the best 4th section she’d ever done! Ha. But my band of burning is higher up, across my belly button? I might mention it to GP when I go next x x

  4. March 14, 2015 / 4:03 am

    You look much better than me. My husband refers to my belly as the flap ha ha because I literally have one!! I’m hoping weight loss will lessen it but why they didn’t chop a bit off during my section I will never know 😉
    Emma lander recently posted..Baby BrainMy Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:25 pm

      Arrrgh yes I wish I’d asked for a tummy tuck!! 😀 x x

  5. March 14, 2015 / 11:34 am

    You have an amazing figure and I’m sure you can get your body to wher you want it as I know how much determination and strong will you have x

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:24 pm

      Ah you’re too kind, thank you x x

  6. March 16, 2015 / 11:11 am

    It is so hard to accept and understand a postnatal body. I love my pregnancy shape, but I hate the aftermath. This will be my 4th section too, and I am already dreading the band of numbness again. You do look amazing though – I know you probably won’t believe me, but you do. Your body did something truly amazing, 4 times over.
    Kate @ Family Fever recently posted..Bump watch: 25 weeksMy Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:24 pm

      Yes my body did do something amazing, and I do try to remember that. Pregnancy does take away control over your body though doesn’t it? I hope your section is gentle on you x x

  7. March 16, 2015 / 11:47 am

    Like you I’m constantly battling with my feelings about my body – my body which is overweight and damaged beyond repair by those three pregnancies. I suspect I have a herniated stomach and the apron caused by three c sections is never going to go away. I hate the way it looks. But . . . look what it gave me. Look what it did. It was worth it.
    Colette B recently posted..Travel is Education – But should we be taking our kids on term time holidays?My Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:23 pm

      Yes, when you think about all that your body has done and has given you… it IS all worth it x x

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 16, 2015 / 9:22 pm

      I think its only natural for us to be concerned about it. Thank you, so far so good! x x

  8. bdbrighton@live.co.uk
    March 20, 2015 / 10:16 am

    I wasn’t too bothered about my post baby body last time as I knew I wanted to get pregnant again pretty quickly, which I did. I am already thinking about ways to help get my shape back already this time round, which is daft as I’ve not even had the baby. In all honestly though I how look under the clothes doesn’t bother me so much, it’s how I look dressed. I definitely learnt to dress for my new shape after I had Athena!
    Good luck with the being more active, it’s certainly easier now we’re coming into spring!

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 22, 2015 / 9:45 pm

      Yep I’ve been the same- 3 babies in 4 years and now I’m done. I want my body back! x x

  9. March 20, 2015 / 11:20 am

    God I love spanx!! Seriously though, you look fab! It’s always going to take time to recover from what it’s been through! At 33 weeks pregnant, I’m already looking forward to getting out running again. It just makes me feel better about myself! x #maternitymatters
    Sam @ Life of Mum recently posted..10 Things I Can’t Wait for After PregnancyMy Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 22, 2015 / 9:44 pm

      Haha Spanx rules! I went for a run today actually, felt good 🙂 x x

  10. Laura Wood
    March 20, 2015 / 9:09 pm

    My dear, you look great. Spanx and all. I’m 13 months postnatal and there is not enough Spanx in the world, believe me. I’m trying to learn that I do not have to look a certain way and I do not have to apologise for my body. I don’t want to use my son as an excuse because I don’t need an excuse. You look great, honestly.

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 22, 2015 / 9:38 pm

      Haha thank you. I guess we all feel differently inside don’t we? I wish I felt no need to apologise for my body too x x x

  11. March 21, 2015 / 4:38 am

    I love that this is your mission statement for your challenge.
    It really is a shame that despite the wonderful things our bodies achieved creating these babies our appearance is still the first thing we think of…..and we really all do think of that whether we want to or not!!
    I, like everyone else think you look fab…but that’s not what matters really it’s all about how you feel so go for it lady! Can’t wait to read how you get on! Xx
    Seychellesmama recently posted..18 weeks pregnantMy Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 22, 2015 / 9:27 pm

      Thanks lovely! Eva and I ran today and we’ve agreed that by the time Elsie is 1 we will be running the entire route that I usually walk- ots of uphill! Eeek. Quite a challenge! x x

  12. March 23, 2015 / 2:41 pm

    Fab and very honest post honey. Give yourself time as your body has done amazing things, but I think, although we’re not supposed to, we all feel a bit like this about our bodies. I’ve not had a baby yet, but feel like a ship in sail while pregnant and it’s not just a bump – everything is expanding!! xx
    Katie Heels and Hooves recently posted..20 weeks: BumpdateMy Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 23, 2015 / 9:03 pm

      Ah you’re right. Our bodies are amazing. And you will be back to your usual self before you know it- only with a precious baby in tow! x xx

  13. March 23, 2015 / 11:01 pm

    I know everyone else has said it but, Spanx or not, I think you look amazing! I was lucky not to have a section last time and I’m hoping I won’t need one this time either. I’ve tried not to worry too much about my shape, I did manage to get back to my pre-pregnancy weight before I got pregnant again, and I’m attempting not too put on quite as much this time as I did with Toby. Having said that, I love my pregnant body and after seemingly spending most of my adult life on a diet it feels great to eat what I want, and not have to suck my tummy in!
    Sarah (@tobygoesbananas) recently posted..Living Arrows 12/52 {2015}My Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 26, 2015 / 10:03 pm

      Ah I always liked my pregnant body too. Enjoy it 🙂 x x

  14. March 25, 2015 / 9:28 pm

    It is difficult isn’t it. Although I don’t really mind the stretchmarks I do hate the wobbly bits and saggy bits that I didn’t have before, no matter what anyone else tells me! I am determined after this pregnancy to get my body back to how I feel happy. Good luck to you!
    Mummy of Two recently posted..Spongebob Squarepants Pinball Game – A Toy ReviewMy Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      March 26, 2015 / 9:54 pm

      I am determined too! x x

  15. March 31, 2015 / 4:45 am

    The female form is quite an incredible form; it gives so much, takes so much, and does so much. It has so many expectations laid on it, so many expectations of itself, and it just keeps giving to all it produces.

    4 children, what incredible feat! I understand the struggle though; ‘yes, it’s achieved much, but I’d still like it like this’. Our mindset about it is so important, as we find new ‘form normal’; especially after a c-section. All the best as you journey towards the form you want.

    Thanks for your linky. #MaternityMatters
    Adventures of a Novice Mum recently posted..My Sunday Photo 29Mar15My Profile

    • ghostwritermummy
      April 2, 2015 / 9:32 am

      You’re right! Thank you. I am learning to appreciate my body again x x x

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