When I became a mother almost seven years ago, I learnt all about a mother’s guilt very quickly. It’s like a nagging, clawing sensation deep inside that just doesn’t let up.
When I became pregnant with the toddler, the guilt intensified.
To my girl, I am so sorry that I have turned your world upside down. I am so sorry that you are going to have to share your parents and your toys and your time. I am so sorry that I won’t be there for you as much as I was…
Now I am pregnant again and the mother’s guilt is working over time.
The toddler is so young. The Big One is so young. Time is stretched already.
When I look at the kids’s faces, they are my world. How can another fit into that world without tears and upset? How can I be doing this to them? How will I find time to teach the toddler everything that I taught the big one? How do I explain to him that he won’t be the baby anymore?
The thing about the guilt of mothers is that is has no reason, no common sense.