I don’t dream about his birth any more. I dream instead about the feelings his birth have left me with. In my dreams I am scared and I am anxious. In my dreams I am angry and I am frustrated. In my dreams, I am alone.
Almost seven years ago he was ripped from my body and the world came tumbling down.
Nothing was the same any more. Nothing made sense. Nothing was carefree. Instead, everything changed. Everything was wrong. Everything was hard. (more…)
It’s been a month or so since we made our first proper vlog! Have you seen it yet? Just in case you haven’t, here we go…
Making the video was a real labor of love, not only because filming, editing and indeed speaking to the camera is all new for us, but because of the potty training journey itself too. In the video I talk about the six steps to potty training success, and one of the first steps is spotting the signs that your little one is ready to start their big new adventure. Being under two, Elsie is probably one of the youngest Huggies ambassadors and certainly the only one who has yet to even start potty training, so when we made the video we were still very much at the ‘accidentally pooing in the bath stage’ (see video)… so where we are now? Here’s a little update.
I posted recently about finally stepping into the GP’s office and walking away with a label around my neck. Post Natal Depression. It hasn’t sat well. It’s off centre, like a pendant too heavy on a delicate chain. Swinging, useless, lopsided and ugly. The wrong label. A little bit off. I couldn’t really explain it, but my heart was saying no. And then I remembered that I’d been there before. In the early days after my son was born, and they told me I had PND and I argued, and they told me over and over again that I was wrong. Back then I stuck to my guns, and those around me who knew me best agreed. Not depression, something else. Something far too complicated to deal with maybe. And so this time, too, the label doesn’t quite fit, and I’m not the only one to believe it.
With my first Think Positive counselling session behind me, I am more assured and more confident that I have not lost all sight of myself. I don’t know why a professional opinion on the state of my mental health means more than my own, but it does. We’re in agreement: post natal depression doesn’t sit right because it’s not right. I’m not depressed. I’m not.
Post Natal Anxiety is my label now, and its of no great surprise at all. And so I am learning to talk about the things that make me anxious, and the reasons why they do. The hope is that I learn to deal with them in a different way, and re-learn how to think positively and with a clearer, more rational response.
I am at the beginning.
I cannot see the end of this tunnel.
No light, not yet. (more…)
We were recently asked to take part in a challenge at mealtimes, and since most mealtimes in our house are challenges in themselves, I thought why not? What’s another battle at the table in the grand scheme of things? With fussy eaters, allergies, intolerances, attitudes and vegetable aversions, we’ll literally take any help we can get when it comes to sorting out the kids’ eating habits. So what is the #ReThinkToddlerPortionSizes campaign all about?
This video explains it all really well, actually: